Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier: SETTLED CONTENTS It’s much safer now for me When I go to the grocery: I’m advised that nuts “May contain nuts” And that rice is “gluten-free.” From the archive TASTES LIKE HEALTH “Oh, you children are …
Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier: MAYOR MAY NOT We can’t know what the future will bring, What health hazards Fate at us will fling, But there’s nothing to fear In Manhattan this year: Mayor Bloomers has banned everything. From the archive: …
Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier: ’S MOTHER Oh, thank goodness the government’s there To precaution and make me beware: I’m now starving to death, Blue from holding my breath, ’Cause I’m frightened of food and of air. From the archive: IT’S …
Water safety regulations already require boaters to carry personal flotation devices (i.e., life vests). As a precaution against flash floods, hurricanes, bridge collapses, and bathtub accidents, all Americans are now required by law to wear life vests at all times. Random checks will insure compliance, with stiff penalties for violators. …
As a precaution against the possibility of hernias, all Americans are now required by law to wear trusses at all times. Random checks will insure compliance, with stiff penalties for violators. Remember, it’s “Trussed or Bust!” This is for our own good.
