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  • Mar 27 / 2017
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Your Weekly Politickle: DNR

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DNR
Extreme measures we should disavow,
The poor thing will not last anyhow,
It is sad but it’s true,
There’s no more we can do:
Let Obamacare die in peace now.

From the archive

UNDELIVERABLE
Now you’re covered to end this “condition”
And can freely forestall all fruition;
Still, you think that just maybe
You might opt for a baby,
But Obamacare won’t grant permission.
(2013)

BAD MEDICINE
If Obamacare’s such a great deal,
Why the effort to con and conceal?
Why the granting of waivers
As personal favors?
Why the fervor for total repeal?
(2011)

CANDY MAN
What can make the pain grow, essential care deny,
Snuff out everyone and make the gurneys pile high?
Obamacare, Obamacare can.
Obamacare can ’cause it nixes right to life and makes the world less full.
(2010)

RECONCILIATION
“Form a line, single file, if you will;
Remain quiet, attentive, and still;
And spare us the drama
As Dr. Obama
Dispenses this large bitter pill.”
(2010)

OBAMACARE
“We would never overtly deny
Any care we’re prepared to supply;
If we do have to ration,
With a practiced compassion
We’ll decide who deserves most to die.”
(2009)

GOOD GRIEF
“Now, children, please don’t cry.
It’s time to say goodbye.
Today’s the day
We booked in May:
It’s Grandma’s turn to die.”
(2009)

IN THE DOGHOUSE
“My poor siblings and I are so sad:
He’s the best friend that we ever had,
With a heart of pure gold,
But he has gotten old,
And it’s time that we euthanize Dad.”
(2009)

Last week’s limerick

DC COMICS
The ones who are putting him down
Are the biggest buffoons in this town:
Who doesn’t know those
Who do this are bozos,
Those who say Donald Trump is a clown?

  • Mar 20 / 2017
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Your Weekly Politickle: DC COMICS

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DC COMICS
The ones who are putting him down
Are the biggest buffoons in this town:
Who doesn’t know those
Who do this are bozos,
Those who say Donald Trump is a clown?

From the archive

RODEOBAMA
Did a single State Fairgoer frown
At the thought of a bull running down
Such a shuffling shirker
And smart-aleck smirker
As Obama the rodeo clown?
(2013)

Last week’s limerick

FALL START
From the clock that I keep on the wall
I acquired one more hour last Fall,
But I never did use it
And will now likely lose it:
Tell me what was the point of it all?

  • Mar 13 / 2017
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Your Weekly Politickle: FALL START

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FALL START
From the clock that I keep on the wall
I acquired one more hour last Fall,
But I never did use it
And will now likely lose it:
Tell me what was the point of it all?

From the archive

ON THE BLINK
Saving daylight is wonderfully wise
And a cinch if a citizen tries.
It’s so simple to do,
I’ll explain it to you:
You save daylight by closing your eyes.
(2007)

OUR CONFUSION
Will we ever develop the knack
Of remembering how to keep track,
Overcoming the “block”
Of resetting our clock:
To “fall forward” or, rather, “fall back”?
(2005)

Last week’s limerick

BARACKSTABBER
Our new president has competition
And will soon have to make a decision:
Should his predecessor be
Allowed to roam free
Or arrested and tried for sedition?

  • Mar 06 / 2017
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Your Weekly Politickle: BARACKSTABBER

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BARACKSTABBER
Our new president has competition
And will soon have to make a decision:
Should his predecessor be
Allowed to roam free
Or arrested and tried for sedition?

From the archive

BIG EARS
Does Obama read my email?
Does Obama tap my phone?
Does he peer into my bedroom
With a dragonfly-shaped drone?
Does he know my favorite color,
Movie, music, and cologne?
Does he know I like chai latte
With a croissant or a scone?
Does he know where I’ve donated,
Where I’ve driven to or flown?
Does he check my charge card charges
Just as if they were his own?
Does he recognize no boundaries
And respect no private zone?
Does Obama lack the decency
To leave us all alone?
(2013)

GOOD NOOSE
With more dirt every day to defend,
Even Hillary can now see the trend:
“It’s just not meant to be,
I’ll need some place to flee,
My great criminal career’s at an end.”
(2016)

WHY? WHY? WHY?
“Is it all the untrue things I’ve said?
Is it that I look more than half-dead?
That I’m guilty of treason,
Could that be the reason?
Is that why I am not way ahead?”
(2016)

A-NOT-HER
If for no other principled reason,
In this present electoral season
With two candidates who
Are repugnant to you,
Choose the one who’s not guilty of treason.
(2016)

APRES MOI
“After me the law traduced,
After me the sword and noose,
The border strains,
Disorder reigns,
After me all hell breaks loose.”
(2014)

ASYLUM
“In America, son, we will see
How the people enjoy liberty!”
“I’m glad papa is dead
And won’t feel what we fled
Taking root in the Land of the Free.”
(2014)

AMERICAN HERO
All the reds Joe McCarthy once named
Have turned out to be just what he claimed.
Is this patriot praised
For the warnings he raised?
No, McCarthy’s the one who is shamed!
(2013)

OATHBUSTER
When he swore, did Obama intend
To preserve and protect and defend?
Were his motives all wrong,
Did he plan all along
To presume and project and upend?
(2012)

FIFTH COLUMN
Our brave battle for self-preservation
Must address the domestic predation
Of those traitors and fools
— All those socialist tools —
Who are hoping to change our great nation.
(2011)

THE BURROWERS
“Just like Cronkite and Edward R. Murrow,
We’re committed, determined, and thorough:
In the media, the schools,
With our radical rules,
We’re the moles that unceasingly burrow.”
(2011)

CHINA PATTERN
“We will tar fossil fuels as ‘unclean,’
Promote other resources as ‘green.’
There’s a catch, which, of course, is
That those greener resources
Are controlled by our red war machine.”
(2011)

CZARDOM & GOMORRAH
“We are in your schools now and polluting
All the innocent minds we’re rebooting:
There’ll be total immersion
In every perversion
And the schools will be safe for recruiting.”
(2011)

HAPPENING
Our Republic he will rearrange
And the rights of the people estrange:
Yes, it can happen here
And it’s now all too clear
What Obama intended by “change.”
(2010)

HOPE AGAINST HOPE
By nefarious allies surrounded,
With socialist nostrums propounded,
Obama has won,
The change has begun,
And I hope that my fears are unfounded.
(2008)

USEFUL IDIOTS
There were businessmen, kids, and their mommies
Joining ministers, imams, and swamis –
There were people galore
Shouting no to the war,
Giving aid to Saddam and the commies.
(2003)

THEY’RE PLAYING OUR SONG
Our nation is destined for grief
If our leader has no fixed belief
And conclusions are drawn
As to whose side he’s on
When China plays “Hail to the Chief!”
(1998)

FAILING MARX
Socialism is dead!
Done in, the indomitable Red!
Or so it would seem,
But in academe
One had better check under one’s bed.
(1998)

Last week’s limerick

BOEUF GRAS
Who’s that marching and what’s their big beef?
Not more malcontents flaunting faux grief?
No, it’s Mardi Gras Day
And it’s revelers at play:
Joie de vivre is the only motif.

  • Feb 27 / 2017
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Your Weekly Politickle: BOEUF GRAS

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Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

BOEUF GRAS
Who’s that marching and what’s their big beef?
Not more malcontents flaunting faux grief?
No, it’s Mardi Gras Day
And it’s revelers at play:
Joie de vivre is the only motif.

From the archive

DOING WITHOUT
To avoid any purchase or rent
Was my niggardly neighbor’s intent,
So I said with mock sorrow,
“I don’t have what you’d borrow:
It’s Ash Wednesday, it’s already Lent.”
(2015)

MARDI GRAS TIME
In New Orleans, where everyone knows
How to scramble for carnival throws,
It’s just one day of fun,
Then the madness is done —
But the madness in Madison grows.
(2011)

HAPPY MARDI GRAS!
When the spirit of carnival reigns,
Sober citizens unplug their brains;
Egotists in disguises
Are proffering prizes
To propel presidential campaigns.
(2008)

FAT TUESDAY
Every revel unravels at last
And evaporates into the past,
For today is soon spent
And tomorrow is Lent:
Forty days to repent and to fast.
(2007)

MAY WE?
It’s not a big “faux pas”
When we say, “Oh, la la!”
Or “laissez faire,”
Or “derriere,”
Or Happy “Mardi Gras!”
(2006)

HAPPY MEDI-GRASS!
Marijuana has helped me a lot!
It’s a marvel, this medical “pot”!
My condition’s the same,
But I’m pleased to proclaim
I’ve forgotten what illness I’ve got!
(2005)

Last week’s limerick

THIS IS CNN
“Hey! Hello! Over here! Can’t you see?
I’ve a question to ask! Call on me!
Are you totally blind?
Are you out of your mind?
I’m a big shot who’s seen on TV!”

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