Your Weekly Politickle: RODHAM

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Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

RODHAM
“I support, I embrace, I exalt
Every victim of sexual assault
– Unless it was Bill
Exercising his will,
In which case, the hussy’s at fault.”

From the Clinton Archive

AKA
Nelson, Luciano, Capone
All had nicknames uniquely their own.
In Bill Clinton’s case,
You can bet “Cigarface”
Is the moniker by which he’ll be known!

BUBBA BATH
Eight years of the Clintons in power
Leave a taste in the mouth that is sour
And an overall sense
That we need a good rinse
And should spend extra time in the shower.

INITIAL REACTION
The intern arrived optimistic,
But her outlook proved unrealistic.
Now she’s anxious to flee,
Having learned that D.C.
Means “Distinguishing Characteristic.”

MR. PRECEDENT
What a vile conglomeration
Of every abomination:
In Clinton’s wake,
Only villains will make
A bid for the nomination.

PUTTING THE LEG IN LEGACY
A filtering V-chip’s desired
‘Til our Masher-in-Chief is retired:
His obsession with sex
Makes our news triple-X
And parental discretion required.

SAFE SAX
“The voter has no head for facts.
They stop him right dead in his tracks.
The public,” said Bill,
“Just wants a cheap thrill.
Now, Hillary, hand me my sax.”

SO THAT’S WHAT YOU CALL IT!
She was flattered he found her appealing,
But preferred that he be less revealing.
Bill tried to explain
He was feeling her pain,
But Paula knew what he was feeling!

STANDARD BARER
We’ll overlook Bill’s obfuscations,
And his sexual aberrations,
And perhaps, within reason,
We’ll tolerate treason
’Cause he’s meeting our low expectations.

STUDENT TEACHER
“If only we’d known before now
What a crafty excuse will allow:
When your villainies vex,
Say it’s just about sex,”
Chuckled Hitler and Stalin and Mao.

SURLY REALISM
A President shouldn’t tell lies
Or do things that are really unwise,
But who cares about “should”
When the economy’s good
And the stock market’s on the rise?

WHO PAYS?
Not so sweet his taste of swill.
Not so cheap his latest thrill.
How high the price
That’s paid for vice!
How right the name of “Bill.”

ZOMBIES
From justice they craftily fled
And avoided the sanctions they dread;
Now O.J. and Bill
Can linger at will
In the night of the fast-living dead.

Last week’s limerick