{"id":13457,"date":"2022-05-16T04:11:00","date_gmt":"2022-05-16T09:11:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/?p=13457"},"modified":"2022-05-16T07:58:20","modified_gmt":"2022-05-16T12:58:20","slug":"your-weekly-politickle-2000-mules","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/your-weekly-politickle-2000-mules\/","title":{"rendered":"Your Weekly Politickle: 2000 MULES"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

2000 MULES
They were paid to deliver the votes,
So to change the results of the totes,
Stuffing box after box
Over multiple blocks,
Thus creating the Joe Biden bloats.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From the archive<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

ERASING ARIZONA
The election was just as we thought, it
Was tainted by mountains of fraud, it
Was stolen from Trump
On behalf of a chump,
And that\u2019s just a single state\u2019s audit.
(2021)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ALL IN
When we went to the auditorium
To demand an audit from all of them,
Public servants said no
\u2019Cause they knew it would show
There should be a total recall of them.
(2021)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MATH CONFUSION
If the number of voters is x
And the number who do vote half x,
I\u2019m afraid I can\u2019t see
How it ever could be
That the total votes cast is 2x.
(2021)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MARICOPA
(to the tune of \u201cCopacabana)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The vote was stolen
It wasn\u2019t chosen
With ballots gathered from the air
And addresses from nowhere<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They were McCain-ites
And dirty low-lifes
And while they tried to distort
Even still they came up short<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They cleared the crowded floor
And they worked behind closed doors
They were dumb and they had no other
Chance to add some votes<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maricopa, Arizona
A virus that\u2019s worse than Corona
Corruption and treason
Were always in season
Maricopa, they broke the law.
(2021)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

MEA CULPA COUNTY
\u201cWe\u2019ve got lots of explaining to do,
As the scandal\u2019s far worse than we knew.
This was no accident,
This stage-managed event:
What we have on our hands is a coup!\u201d
(2021)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

SCORECARD
It was late, Donald Trump way ahead,
So I called it a night, went to bed;
While I slept, an odd \u201cglitch\u201d
And improbable switch
Made Joe Biden the winner instead!
(2020)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

DEAD TO RIGHTS
\u201cI admit I\u2019m a little distraught
That your friends and mine finally got caught,\u201d
I said in palaver
With a fellow cadaver,
\u201cBut we voted more times than I thought.\u201d
(2020)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

AMAZING RACE
What polls tell us is probably wrong,
As we\u2019ll find out before very long:
They can\u2019t measure the grace
That\u2019s inspiring this race
And making the patriots strong.
(2020)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

CANCEL CULTURE
As a voter, I used to rejoice
At the franchise that gave me a voice,
But the system\u2019s now fixed
And my own vote is nixed
By a fraudulent balloter\u2019s choice.
(2020)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

UNIVERSAL SUFFRAGE
\u201cAn illegal, a felon, a tot,
A nonresident, even a bot:
They should all get to vote
And be part of the tote,
Whether living or human or not.\u201d
(2019)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

VOTO FINISH
\u201cImmigration concerns are what spur us,
Opposition will never deter us,
And the line of the souls
Heading out to the polls
Stretches all the way down to Honduras.\u201d
(2018)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

FRANCHISE OPPORTUNITY
When a voter votes multiple times
And is \u201cpunished\u201d for multiple crimes
With a sentence commuted,
Are not others recruited
Likewise to vote multiple times?
(2014)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

GRAVE RESPONSIBILITY
Though his body will surely decay,
A dead Democrat\u2019s ballot may stay:
He moves in with the moles,
But remains on the rolls
And continues to vote anyway.
(2012)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

NIGHT OF THE VOTING DEAD
\u201cWe\u2019ll be summoned from slumberous state
To endorse the biennial slate;
Then it\u2019s back to the grave,
Where we\u2019ll try to behave
\u2018Til another electoral date!\u201d
(2004)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

REGISTERED VOTERS
The polls open and who comes in?
Mary Poppins and Mickey Finn,
Then Betty Boop
And Alley Oop,
Sherlock Holmes and Gunga Din!
(2004)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

TWO-DAY ELECTION?
To ensure that the balloting may
Proceed in an orderly way:
On Tuesday, please note,
All Republicans vote \u2013
And all Democrats on the next day.
(2002)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

WINNING BY A WHISKER
\u201cOur Party is poised to prevail
With this new registration by mail:
All corpses and cats
Are staunch Democrats,
So our candidates simply can\u2019t fail!\u201d
(1998)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ROCK THE VOTE (TO SLEEP)
If free markets are something you dread,
Our Constitution is over your head,
And American history
To you is a mystery,
On election day, please, stay in bed!
(1998)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Last week\u2019s limerick<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

CALCULATOR
\u201cI discovered to my dismay
She\u2019d assigned me a part in a \u2018play,\u2019
And her fond affirmations
Were just public relations
To sustain her sweet image and sway.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier: 2000 MULESThey were paid to deliver the votes,So to change the results of the totes,Stuffing box after boxOver multiple blocks,Thus creating the Joe Biden bloats. From the archive ERASING ARIZONAThe election was just as we thought, …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"slim_seo":{"title":"Your Weekly Politickle: 2000 MULES - Politickles","description":"Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier: 2000 MULES They were paid to deliver the votes, So to change the results of th"},"_slim_seo_primary_term_category":0,"_slim_seo_primary_term_post_tag":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13457","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13457","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13457"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13457\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13457"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13457"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/politickles.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13457"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}