Politickles

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Three themes are emerging from the newly released emails: (1) prominent scientists central to the global warming debate are taking measures to conceal rather than disseminate underlying data and discussions; (2) these scientists view global warming as a political “cause” rather than a balanced scientific inquiry; and (3) many of these scientists frankly admit to each other that much of the science is weak and dependent on deliberate manipulation of facts and data. – Forbes.com

We’ll be heating and eating leftovers today — and thanking God for the continuing exposure of the turkeys behind the global warming/climate change hoax.

Faith in Gore

Tea Time, Episode 11: Environmental Impact

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

FAITH IN GORE
“All you skeptics who try to besmirch
Our beliefs will be left in the lurch
As we celebrate dearth
And increase our net worth
At St. Albert Gore’s Climate Change Church.”

From the archive:

WARMAGEDDON
In the end and come what might,
Climate changers may be right:
In the depths of hell,
Where such liars dwell,
Things can get real hot all right!
(2010)

Fraudster the Snowman

Last week’s limerick:

FIFTH COLUMN
Our brave battle for self-preservation
Must address the domestic predation
Of those traitors and fools
– All those socialist tools –
Who are hoping to change our great nation.

Evann and I  had two misconceptions when we moved to St. Louis in 1995. Let me rephrase that. We had numerous misconceptions, and still do, but two of those misconceptions pertained specifically to St. Louis.

The first misconception had to do with life expectancy. We thought when we left our homicidal hometown that we were escaping from the murder capital of America to an oasis of humanity in the heartland. We discovered, shortly after relocation, that St. Louis and New Orleans have long been locked in bittersweet rivalry for the dubious distinction of deadliest destination, a rivalry that continues to this day.

The second misconception had to do with climate exchange. Having grown up in a place that’s miserably hot in the summer but pleasantly warm in the winter (New Orleans) and having lived in a place that’s miserably cold in the winter but pleasantly cool in the summer (Weyauwega, Wisc.), we automatically assumed that a place halfway between (St. Louis) would be ideal year-round: pleasantly warm in winter, pleasantly cool in summer.

In short, we thought we’d get the best of both worlds. In fact, we took it for granted and looked forward to this climatic nirvana with great anticipation. It never occurred to us, even for a moment, that we would get the worst of both. What kind of stupid nonsense is that? But that’s what we got: miserable heat in the summer, miserable cold in the winter. Plus, no seafood. What the hell! For 16 years now, we have sweated and shivered through this thermally unjust situation.

Eureka!

As Congress looks for ways to trim the budget, the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) represents an opportunity for up to $9 billion in savings. This outfit has become little more than an advocacy group for trendy leftist causes operating on the public’s dime. Many liberal policies being promoted are so unpopular that congressional Democrats can’t muster the votes to get them through the proper legislative process. So they go to the EPA instead. – Washington Times

DIRTY BUSINESS
“When we measured no parts per million,
We raised standards to parts per billion.
We’re the new EPA
And we’ll have it our way,
Finding parts per trillion and zillion!”
2000

ABATED BREATH
Whether sickly or healthy and hale,
We object when the air gets too stale,
But what shall we do
When they ban CO2
And deny us the right to exhale?
2001

The Obama administration is repeating the mistakes of President Jimmy Carter’s failed energy policies, which marred his term and stigmatized the 1970s. They are leading us straight into another national energy disaster. – Steve Forbes

Last week on his show Bill O’Reilly asked, “Why has southern New York turned into the tundra?” and then said he had a call into me. I appreciate the question.

As it turns out, the scientific community has been addressing this particular question for some time now and they say that increased heavy snowfalls are completely consistent with what they have been predicting as a consequence of man-made global warming. – Al Gore (The Fraudster Himself)

Fraudster the Snowman

by F.R. Duplantier

Fraudster the Snowman
Was an enterprising pol,
With a trust-fund life
And an upturned nose
And a heart made out of coal.

Fraudster the Snowman
Was a senator, they say.
He was made of snow,
But the voters know
How he came to life one day.

There must have been some magic in
Those tight blue jeans they found,
For when they placed them on his legs
He began to dance around.

O, Fraudster the Snowman
Found a way to live for free.
While the people pay,
He could laugh and play
And drive around in an SUV.

Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
Look at Fraudster go.
Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
O the bilge of snow!

Fraudster the Snowman
Knew the sun was hot some days,
So he said, “I’ll hoax
All the stupid folks
And get myself a big pay raise.”

Down to the village,
With a hockey stick in hand
And some bogus graphs
And some doctored stats,
Showing crisis for the land.

He led them to his Waterloo,
Where the facts came out at last,
But he never once admitted that
He was just plain full of crap.

For Fraudster the Snowman
Liked to always have his way,
So he waved goodbye
Saying, “Don’t deny,
I’ll be back again some day.”

Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
Look at Fraudster go.
Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
O the bilge of snow!

Join the Fraudster the Snowman Fan Club on Facebook.

Fraudster the Snowman

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

GUILT TEA
When it heats up and lets out a scream,
My tea kettle releases some steam:
I’m committing a crime
By affecting the clime!
Does this seem just a little extreme?

From the archive:

TUB SNUBBERS
They abstain from Palmolive and Prell
And perform their ablutions pell-mell,
Neither soaking nor scouring
In their five-minute showering:
Now we know why some Englishmen smell.
(2010)

BUSYBODIES
They’ll first find tobacco at fault,
Then coffee, wine, spirits, and malt.
Then they’ll next demonize
Colas, burgers, and fries,
Then all snacks made with sugar and salt!
(1999)

NO CURE FOR THE COMMON SCOLD
They insist we directly disown
Every pleasure and pastime that’s known.
Those “natural” nags
And health-conscious hags
Oh, why can’t they leave us alone?
(1998)

Last week’s limerick:

THE WEALTH OF RATIONS
If you want to show that you care,
Then you have to learn how to share
And surrender to me
Half your property:
What could possibly be more fair?

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

CLIMATE EXCHANGE
I will trade you the Springtime in Spain
For the Autumn in Southern Ukraine,
And the Summer in Mali
For the Winter in Bali –
Plus September in Alsace-Lorraine.

From the archive:

VICTIMLESS CLIME
The penguin complained, “It’s too hot!”
The hippo replied, “No, it’s not!”
The gator, when polled,
Insisted, “Too cold!”
And the polar bear grumbled, “What rot!”
(1998)

Last week’s limerick:

BAD SAMARITANS
When a brother has wandered astray,
Those who love him will show him the way;
Those who follow the fashion
Of corrupted compassion
Will assure him his sin is okay.

The study’s authors said they found “immense” differences in both the expertise and scientific prominence of those who supported the “primary tenets” of latest assessments made by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) and those who were sceptical of the IPCC’s findings. – BBC News

A rigged study to lend support to the climate scientists who rig studies!

Fraudster the Snowman

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