Politickles

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

FAITH IN GORE
“All you skeptics who try to besmirch
Our beliefs will be left in the lurch
As we celebrate dearth
And increase our net worth
At St. Albert Gore’s Climate Change Church.”

From the archive:

WARMAGEDDON
In the end and come what might,
Climate changers may be right:
In the depths of hell,
Where such liars dwell,
Things can get real hot all right!
(2010)

Fraudster the Snowman

Last week’s limerick:

FIFTH COLUMN
Our brave battle for self-preservation
Must address the domestic predation
Of those traitors and fools
– All those socialist tools –
Who are hoping to change our great nation.

As Congress looks for ways to trim the budget, the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) represents an opportunity for up to $9 billion in savings. This outfit has become little more than an advocacy group for trendy leftist causes operating on the public’s dime. Many liberal policies being promoted are so unpopular that congressional Democrats can’t muster the votes to get them through the proper legislative process. So they go to the EPA instead. – Washington Times

DIRTY BUSINESS
“When we measured no parts per million,
We raised standards to parts per billion.
We’re the new EPA
And we’ll have it our way,
Finding parts per trillion and zillion!”
2000

ABATED BREATH
Whether sickly or healthy and hale,
We object when the air gets too stale,
But what shall we do
When they ban CO2
And deny us the right to exhale?
2001

The Obama administration is repeating the mistakes of President Jimmy Carter’s failed energy policies, which marred his term and stigmatized the 1970s. They are leading us straight into another national energy disaster. – Steve Forbes

The Obama administration’s policies are causing Americans to pay far more for gasoline and other fuels than necessary. America is awash in fossil-fuel energy sources with almost 30 percent of the world’s coal and 80 percent of the world’s oil shale – which contains an estimated three times the recoverable oil reserves of Saudi Arabia. – Richard Rahn

Last week on his show Bill O’Reilly asked, “Why has southern New York turned into the tundra?” and then said he had a call into me. I appreciate the question.

As it turns out, the scientific community has been addressing this particular question for some time now and they say that increased heavy snowfalls are completely consistent with what they have been predicting as a consequence of man-made global warming. – Al Gore (The Fraudster Himself)

Fraudster the Snowman

by F.R. Duplantier

Fraudster the Snowman
Was an enterprising pol,
With a trust-fund life
And an upturned nose
And a heart made out of coal.

Fraudster the Snowman
Was a senator, they say.
He was made of snow,
But the voters know
How he came to life one day.

There must have been some magic in
Those tight blue jeans they found,
For when they placed them on his legs
He began to dance around.

O, Fraudster the Snowman
Found a way to live for free.
While the people pay,
He could laugh and play
And drive around in an SUV.

Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
Look at Fraudster go.
Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
O the bilge of snow!

Fraudster the Snowman
Knew the sun was hot some days,
So he said, “I’ll hoax
All the stupid folks
And get myself a big pay raise.”

Down to the village,
With a hockey stick in hand
And some bogus graphs
And some doctored stats,
Showing crisis for the land.

He led them to his Waterloo,
Where the facts came out at last,
But he never once admitted that
He was just plain full of crap.

For Fraudster the Snowman
Liked to always have his way,
So he waved goodbye
Saying, “Don’t deny,
I’ll be back again some day.”

Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
Look at Fraudster go.
Huffedy humbug,
Huffedy humbug,
O the bilge of snow!

Join the Fraudster the Snowman Fan Club on Facebook.

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

IMPATIENCE
The election’s just two months away,
But it’s hard to endure the delay:
How we long for a rout
And the bums all thrown out!
How we wish we were voting today!

From the archive:

DEM BONES
In the backyard we broke out the bibs,
Fed our faces with barbecued ribs.
Now we’re nursing the embers
And awaiting November’s
Bacchanalia of barbecued Libs.
(2010)

PAYBACK
If Pelosi can get enough votes
To shove health-care “reform” down our throats,
You can bet we’ll remember
And cast votes in November
To be “reconciled” with Judas goats.
(2010)

Last week’s politickle:

LILIES
Without work or an income instead,
There’s no way to provide daily bread,
Unless friends in high places
Supply manna and graces
To keep you and your family fed.

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

CLIMATE EXCHANGE
I will trade you the Springtime in Spain
For the Autumn in Southern Ukraine,
And the Summer in Mali
For the Winter in Bali –
Plus September in Alsace-Lorraine.

From the archive:

VICTIMLESS CLIME
The penguin complained, “It’s too hot!”
The hippo replied, “No, it’s not!”
The gator, when polled,
Insisted, “Too cold!”
And the polar bear grumbled, “What rot!”
(1998)

Last week’s limerick:

BAD SAMARITANS
When a brother has wandered astray,
Those who love him will show him the way;
Those who follow the fashion
Of corrupted compassion
Will assure him his sin is okay.

While senators froth over Goldman Sachs and derivatives, a climate trading scheme being run out of the Chicago Climate Exchange would make Bernie Madoff blush. Its trail leads to the White House. – IBD Editorial

I grew up in New Orleans, where the summers are too hot but the winters are mild. In my thirties, I lived in Wisconsin, where the winters are too cold but the summers are mild. In my forties, I moved to St. Louis and thought I’d have the best of both climates: mild summers and mild winters. Instead, I got the worst of both. Where do I go to trade the climate I have for the one I want?

List

The Obama administration’s primary mode of governance is literally to create crises where none actually exist. . . . “Big Lies” transform people and entire societies, and the most powerful form of “Big Lie,” at least when it comes to government, is the manufactured crisis. – David Kupelian

The Big Lie is but one of many conspiracies rampant in the world.