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2019

2019

The Year in Verse
A Politickles Retrospective

PLAN C
What they did way back when and kept hid
Are the things they now claim that Trump did:
To establish equivalence
And encourage ambivalence
Is their latest, most desperate bid.

SACRIFICIAL
Lenten Fridays, abstaining from meat,
There are limits to what I can eat:
I’ve no choice but to scrimp
And eat Barbecued Shrimp,
Blackened Redfish, and Oysters Lafitte.

ROE v. PPFA
A class action suit surely should
Be filed against Planned Parenthood
For the women they lied to,
And the babies that died, too:
Would you rule for these victims? I would.

MCCABE AND MR. MUELLER
It’s the story of Andy and Bob
And the president they tried to rob
By staging a coup
With charges untrue
On behalf of the Insider mob.

SANDY
She may sound like she’s been on a bender,
But this babbling, bug-eyed bartender
Has great knowledge and skill:
If you ask her, she will
Make a pitcher of drinks in a blender.

AOC
“OMG! Can it possibly be
No one’s had this idea before me?
To recoup what we spent,
Tax one hundred percent
And make everything everywhere free!”

ADDRESS
All the fussbudgets waiting to see
Where “The State of the Union” will be!
I don’t care if it’s here
Or instead over there:
Its location means nothing to me.

ELDER ABUSE
When the March for Life ended, a crowd
Of hate-spewing racists got loud
And those Covington kids
With their red MAGA lids
Were accosted by lying “Red Cloud.”

PRESS INTO SERVICE
Just what kind of a wall should we pick?
We don’t need one of steel or of brick:
Give Acosta the order
To stand on the border.
Who could penetrate someone that thick?

REWARD & PUNISHMENT
Those sweet carrots on a string
And hard sticks you sometimes swing –
When too often denied
Or too often applied –
Lose their sapor and their sting.

OH, MITT!
Let us give you some advice:
You’ve already rolled the dice,
You had your turn,
And it’s time you learn
That we won’t nominate you twice.

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