As a doctor he may be renowned,
And his skills could transfer to the mound,
But this man of some stature
Can’t connect with the catcher
And instead pitches wild to the ground.
From the archive
FAUCI ON THE MOUND
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright,
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light;
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere women flirt,
But there is no joy in Swampville—mighty Fauci has struck dirt.
Dr. Fauci has long been in bed
With Bill Gates, the old Microsoft head:
Though he tried to inspire us
With a fear of the virus,
His vaccine is what scares us instead.
Last week’s limerick
They are going to take you to task
If you don’t do the thing that they ask:
They don’t care if it works
Or they’re acting like jerks,
They’re compelled to command, “Wear a mask!”