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Your Weekly Politickle: LOSERS

  • Feb 24 / 2020
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Your Weekly Politickle: LOSERS


LOSERS
Bernie and Lizzie and Joe,
Petey and Amy all show
Zero potential
To be presidential:
This pathetic selection’s no-go.

From the archive

DEBATE BUCKET
Beto, Buttigieg, Biden, and Booker,
Castro, Gillibrand, Gabbard the looker,
Warren, Klobuchar, Sanders:
Every single one panders,
As do Swalwell and Harris the hooker.
(2019)

NOTA
Two dozen Dems vie for domination
To see who can get the nomination,
But whomever they choose
The Democrats lose
Because every one’s an abomination.
(2019)

BERN WARD
“Bernie Sanders, I’m on your team!
It’s so cool you look like ‘The Scream’!
You can bet I would cast
My vote for you fast
If I wasn’t still under eighteen!”
(2016)

BERN, BABY, BERN!
If you’re fired up by someone who panders
To ignorant, idle demanders,
Then place your hope
In a misanthrope:
The self-avowed socialist Sanders.
(2016)

WORST FIRSTS
All those firsts were considered quite foreign
‘Til the day we ostensibly swore in
The first Catholic, Jack,
The first black man, Barack,
The first Native American, Warren.
(2015)

MR. PRECEDENT
What a vile conglomeration
Of every abomination:
In Clinton’s wake,
Only villains will make
A bid for the nomination.
(1999)

Last week’s limerick

SHOWTIME
Please be patient, you’re in for a treat,
Grab some popcorn and find a good seat,
Soon the show will begin
And the good guys will win
As the bad guys go down to defeat.



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