Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:
As can now be convincingly shown,
Every mass shooter’s mindset is known:
Though he may be insane,
He will still use his brain
And decide to attack gun-free zones.
From the archive
We hear calls for the banning of guns
Every time a mass murderer stuns,
But if bombs, cars, or knives
Have claimed multiple lives,
We hear calls for the banning of guns.
Before going all in, why not pause
To research pros and cons of your “cause”?
For example, inquire
Why the murder rate’s higher
In the cities with gun-control laws.
ARMS & THE MANDATE
What the Second Amendment defends
Is a right on which all else depends:
To resist subjugation
Of ourselves and our nation
And live free as our Maker intends.
“When all private gun ownership’s barred,
I’m sure giving up mine won’t be hard:
I’ll be safe as before,
And perhaps even more –
’Cause I’ll have a well-armed bodyguard.”.
Though the news out of Newtown was grim,
Mayor Bloomberg’s reaction was dim.
Why we keep and bear arms?
To respond to alarms
And protect us from tyrants like him.
A stripper deemed too independent
Was called into court as defendant;
She said of her charms:
“I’ve the right ‘to bare arms’;
It’s enshrined in the Second Amendment.”
“Wake up, Dear, go downstairs, and look!
I heard a strange noise in the nook!”
“Where’s the key to the lock
On my .380 Glock?”
“Oh, I hung it somewhere on a hook!”
WITNESS FOR THE DEFENSE
Anyone who cannot be persuaded
That our gun rights must not be degraded
Should inquire of the Swiss,
Who are armed and don’t miss,
Why it is that they’re never invaded.
BETTER READY THAN DEAD
Here’s a survey that needs to be done
On the merits of having a gun:
Ask anyone harmed
By a thug who was armed
If he wishes he, too, had had one.
Last week’s limerick
BYE BYE, BIRDIE
“I never was a quitter
And I’m not the least bit bitter,
But, if I can’t say
Things in my own way,
Then I’m giving up on Twitter.”