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Your Weekly Politickle: K SERA

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Your Weekly Politickle: K SERA

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

K SERA
“Justice of the Supreme Court I will be
When I’m grown up, you wait and you’ll see –
Unless somebody nosy
Conspires to expose me
For tantrums I threw at age three.”

From the archive

BRETT KAVANAUGH*
(to the tune of “Chim Chim Cher-ee”)

Brett Kavanaugh
Brett Kavanaugh
In him we’ll see
A justice as just as
A justice can be

Brett Kavanaugh
Brett Kavanaugh
He’ll be so true
As justice he’ll do what
Good justices do
(Not try to act like
A lawmaker too)

Long was the letter
Of law misconstrued
He may need to sweep
Away much that’s accrued.

Brett Kavanaugh, ETC.

Out with the smoke,
Emanations, and haze!
Penumbras begone!
Brett will sweep them away!

Brett Kavanaugh, ETC.

A JUSTICE LIKE SCALIA*
(to the tune of “How Do You
Solve a Problem like Maria?”)

How do you top a justice like Scalia?
How to replace a lion of the bench?
How do you find a mind to match Scalia’s?
A textualist! An originalist! A mensch!

Many a thing you’d like in his successor:
Unwillingness to obfuscate or fudge,
Respect for the law’s intent
And eloquence in dissent,
Principles from which he’ll never budge.

Oh, how do you top a justice like Scalia?
How to replace a giant of a judge?

WE’RE GETTING GORSUCH*
(to the tune of “Get Me
to the Church on Time”)

We’re getting Gorsuch as a justice
He’s got a brilliant legal mind
Neil’s no beginner, Trump picked a winner!
For justice of the court, Neil’s fine!

He will protect our Constitution
And all the rights therein enshrined,
Giving assent to original intent!
For justice of the court, Neil’s fine!

Religious freedoms he will support
And right to life won’t come up short

We’re getting Gorsuch as a justice
He’s got a brilliant legal mind
Oh. Mama mia! Another Scalia!
For justice of the court, Neil’s fine!

*Commissioned by PublicAdvocateUSA.org, 2017-8

YOUR PENUMBRA’S UP
We will have a conservative Court,
One that won’t legislate or distort
The plain meaning of laws
To advance a bad cause,
One that won’t invent “rights” to abort.
(2018)

SUPREME FOLLY
Who’d have thought there would come such a time
When the butchering of babes was no crime?
Now another miscarriage:
Homosexual “marriage,”
Legalized by a panel of nine.
(2015)

KAGANROO COURT
Poor Obama is losing support,
But he still has a sure last resort:
He can perpetrate strange
And perpetual change
Placing radicals on the High Court.
(2010)

SUPREME INDIFFERENCE
Should our judges be judged by their gender,
Or the justness of verdicts they render?
Should we reckon their race,
Or their ken in a case
As a strict Constitution defender?
(2009)

SUPREME IRONY
From first principles he won’t budge.
Constitutionally he won’t fudge.
But with Durbin and Biden
And their buddies decidin’,
He’s not “fit” to become a judge.
(2005)

LAWRENCE V. TEXAS
The evil with which men are ridden
In normal times hardly is hidden,
But no era’s more awful
Than when vice is made lawful
And propriety, then, is forbidden.
(2003)

LEGAL ISSUE
Five Justices’ wanton support
Preserves the grim “right” to abort:
To keep babies alive,
Replace one of those five
And establish a life-choosing Court.
(2000)

JUDICIAL RESTRAINT
It’s a perfectly valid complaint:
An activist judge is no saint.
So, give him a jacket
That ties in the back; it
Will force him to show some restraint.
(1998)

Last week’s limerick

ANONYMOUS SOURCE
“My identity’s always a mystery
And my broadsides bombastic and blistery:
When opponents are slighted,
I’m the one who is cited,
I’m the most quoted person in history.”

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