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  • Jun 18 / 2018
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Your Weekly Politickle: EYE BEAM

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

EYE BEAM
“Some opinions just make me irate,
They’re not worthy of public debate,
And the bigots who say them –
I just want to slay them:
How I hate all those people who hate!”

From the archive

AD HOMINEM
“My rhetorical skills are third-rate,
But I never have lost a debate:
Facts and logic I lack,
So I launch an attack
And accuse my opponent of hate!”
(2017)

E PLURIBUS
Our last names may be Hess, Hock, or Harrigan,
Federov, Feldstein, or Farrakhan,
MacDonald, Mandina,
Nguyen, Wong, Kim, or Pena,
But we’re one and we’re all all-American.
(2016)

HILLARY WHO HATES*
I’m Hillary who hates all men,
Hillary who hates all men, all men.
I hate men in the diplomatic corps,
I hate men going off to war.

And every one is an enemy,
I couldn’ t stand a manly kind of man.
I’m a hate-filled hag, I’m Hillary,
Hillary who hates all men.
*to the tune of “Henry the 8th”
(2015)

PROJECTIONISTS
It’s a simple, effective deceit:
Those called “racist” are doomed to defeat,
Yet the ones with most gall,
The most racist of all,
Are the pandering liberal elite.
(2014)

H STANDS FOR HATE
Hillary’s known for intolerant views:
She hates blacks, she hates Christians and Jews,
She hates soldiers and cops
And all men who aren’t fops –
She’s the candidate haters will choose.
(2008)

THE RULES
“We can tell filthy lies about you
And there’s nothing at all you can do,
But we’ll make such a fuss
If you criticize us –
Even if what you say is quite true.”
(2007)

IN TOLERANCE
Left-wing radicals running our schools
Do great harm with their inverted rules:
They oppose every norm,
Reject custom and form,
And show deference to freaks and to fools.
(2007)

THE LIBERAL
“You may think I’ve got rocks in my head
Or that maybe I’m even brain-dead,
But you needn’t complain
‘Cause I don’t use my brain:
I rely on emotions instead.”
(2004)

DIVISION LEADER
Who has kept black Americans down
And spread hatred from town to town?
No, it’s no Anglo-Saxon
But the Reverend Jackson
Who’s the rabidest racist around!
(2001)

BLANK LIKE ME
Census takers who tally my head
Will not know if I’m black, white, or red:
Because, in the space
To designate race,
I’ll inscribe the word “human” instead.
(2000)

PREFIXATION
Adding Euro- and Afro- won’t do:
Ethnic conflict will only ensue.
No hyphen for me:
I’m happy to be
An American through and through.
(1998)

Last week’s limerick

IF IT PROSPER
All the sins of the Clintons are bared,
Yet you’d think not a single soul cared,
But we know what’s the reason
None dare call it treason:
They’re complicit, complacent, or scared.

  • Jun 11 / 2018
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Your Weekly Politickle: IF IT PROSPER

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

IF IT PROSPER
All the sins of the Clintons are bared,
Yet you’d think not a single soul cared,
But we know what’s the reason
None dare call it treason:
They’re complicit, complacent, or scared.

From the archive

URANIUM ONE
To avoid an erroneous conclusion,
Let’s begin by dispelling confusion:
It was Hillary who took
Russian bribes like a crook,
It was Hillary engaged in collusion.
(2017)

WHY? WHY? WHY?
“Is it all the untrue things I’ve said?
Is it that I look more than half-dead?
That I’m guilty of treason,
Could that be the reason?
Is that why I am not way ahead?”
(2016)

$PEECHE$
She’s about as exciting as clay
And has nothing of interest to say,
But the muckety-mucks
Give her millions of bucks
‘Cause they know that they must pay to play.
(2016)

CASHIFIED INFORMATION
“For accelerated authorization
With regard to above application:
To ensure I approve you,
It might well behoove you
To kick in to my family foundation.”
(2015)

WICKED
Through years the graft extends
And favors for their “friends”:
They plundered like Vandals,
Now Hillary’s scandals
Are burning at both ends.
(2015)

BELLE OF BENGHAZI
The worst candidates money can buy
Are the ones psychopathically sly,
So inherently truthless,
Self-absorbedly ruthless
They don’t care when their countrymen die.
(2014)

INSIDE JOB
Having failed in a decades-long try,
An appreciative communist spy
Pays a due compliment
To our own President
For destroying the FBI.
(1998)

CLINTONIAN DIPLOMACY
“We’ll supply whatsoever you need
To ensure your armed forces succeed,
And we won’t make a fuss
If you use them on us,
‘Cause our sole motivation is greed.
(1998)

SOLITARY ASSURED DESTRUCTION
Has Bill taken leave of his senses,
Dismantling all our defenses
And providing resources
To enemy forces
Regardless of consequences?
(1998)

THEY’RE PLAYING OUR SONG
Our nation is destined for grief
If our leader has no fixed belief
And conclusions are drawn
As to whose side he’s on
When China plays “Hail to the Chief!”
(1998)

Last week’s limerick

FROM ‘RUSSIA’ WITH LOVE
Short-term goal: Infiltrate and derail
And make sure Donald Trump can’t prevail;
Mission code name: No Drama;
Agent: Double Obama;
Long-term goal: Keep us all out of jail.

  • Jun 04 / 2018
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YWP: FROM ‘RUSSIA’ WITH LOVE

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

FROM ‘RUSSIA’ WITH LOVE
Short-term goal: Infiltrate and derail
And make sure Donald Trump can’t prevail;
Mission code name: No Drama;
Agent: Double Obama;
Long-term goal: Keep us all out of jail.

From the archive

GOOD NOOSE
With more dirt every day to defend,
Even Hillary can now see the trend:
“It’s just not meant to be,
I’ll need some place to flee,
My great criminal career’s at an end.”
(2016)

Last week’s limerick

BARACK THE BRAIN
He’s the smartest in the room?
Does that mean we can assume
The location where
None can compare
Is the closet for the broom?

  • May 28 / 2018
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Your Weekly Politickle: BARACK THE BRAIN

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

BARACK THE BRAIN
He’s the smartest in the room?
Does that mean we can assume
The location where
None can compare
Is the closet for the broom?

From the archive

SOT-U
Here’s a drinking game you’ll want to try
If your goal is to get really high:
Watch Obama’s address
And then drink (to excess)
Every time he says I, me, or my.
(2015)

OBAMA IN THE HIGHEST
“With the pope, I made such an impression
That he asked me to hear his confession.
I replied, with a nod,
‘I’m related to God
And would gladly provide intercession.’”
(2014)

HOSANNA OBAMA!
This convention was more than just odd,
With the delegates given a prod
To embrace depraved gaiety,
Overthrow the true deity,
And install Lord Obama as god.
(2012)

BARACK AROUND THE CLOCK
Get ready, Blogger Nation,
For the pettifog-oration:
Cue the abstractions
And the cultic reactions!
It’s Obama’s inauguration!
(2009)

Last week’s limerick

MS-13
If his morals are well below average
And his instinct’s to rampage and ravage,
It becomes understandable
Why one calls him an animal –
Or subhuman or beastly or savage.

  • May 21 / 2018
  • 0
Uncategorized

Your Weekly Politickle: MS-13

Feel free to publish, post, or pass on Your Weekly Politickle by F.R. Duplantier:

MS-13
If his morals are well below average
And his instinct’s to rampage and ravage,
It becomes understandable
Why one calls him an animal –
Or subhuman or beastly or savage.

Last week’s limerick

SCHNEIDERMAN
Schneiderman, Schneiderman
Has that Weiner and Spitzer gland:
S&M is his style,
Choking chicks makes him smile.
Look out! Here comes weird Schneiderman!

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